You Would Tell Me If I Was Wearing A Moo-Moo, Wouldn’t You?

by Dan QueirozSomething disturbing happened over the Winter. All my shorts shrank. Every pair, even the skorts. (Yes, I own skorts.) They fit last September and now they’re too small. Obviously global warming is to blame. There is no other explanation.

Rather than dwelling on the problem I decided to concentrate on a solution – SHOPPING. More specifically, shopping for pretty, flowing Summer dresses. Dresses that say, “I am a grown up, a mom with sexy style, a woman that doesn’t need stupid shrinky shorts.” Then, as I stood admiring myself in the mirror, a moment of almost-40 terror flashed through my mind.

Am I fashion-forward or just one step closer to wearing moo moos?

Seriously, is this how it happens? Your shorts don’t fit anymore so you find cute little belted dresses that are more comfy. Then suddenly those dresses are getting a little snug so you take the belts off and call them “flowing”. Next thing you know, you’re looking in Nana’s closet saying, “that’s exactly what I need!”

I know I’m not there yet, but if I’m skipping down the yellow brick road to see the Wizard of Moo Moos I want somebody to tell me. Now. And after you write to me take a moment to write Al Gore before this happens to you, too.

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